I - fucking - don't - know .
Good start, I started my day by chatting with Syaff. Nice chat and he eventually asked my number.
I was supposed to go to Siloso with Tracy today but for no reason she canceled it and BOOM I got no idea what to go since I was bored to death. I needed to go out no matter what. My mood slightly dropped, I decided to have lunch outside and took a nice nap. It was so helpful. Until I woke up, I got Lolo's message on Fb saying that he waited for me. I replied it like many times but I didn't get feedback. I didn't know what I was supposed to get in touch with him. I did try to call him, sent him message but I couldn't still reach him. For heaven's sake, he seemed like give me chaos, so confusing.
I also thoughtful to meet Syaff this evening but he didn't call me until 5 am. I was so upset, I need to chill my self so that I called Tracy. Thank God, Tracy was also in a crisis mood. Haha. So together, we decided to go to Jurong Point to have dinner. Thankfully, she was allowed to go out at nite by her mom. Turns out, Jurong Point was a nice place. I think, it's huge enough and so fascinating as well. Nice place. We had dinner at Banquet. Guess, it's been a while since the last time I had dinner. lol.
While we were walking around there, I kept texting with Syaff. He said that he did attempt to call me but it seemed like my phone was unreachable. wtf, I knew that there's something wrong with my phone. (I do really need new phone, mom. please?) At first, it went so well until we got to one point when he said he wants to meet me once before we think about having dating or stuff. WTF. I got angry. I just.. It just means nothing to me. it really does. aargh, I mean, truth to be told, I DON'T LIKE DATING. I DON'T LIKE TO DATE. I'm not a girl who is into dating like many times with one boy to another, NOPE I REALLY AM NOT. and I couldn't imagine how I know my dating is dating another girl, he kisses and treats her the way he does to me. AH, I DON'T WANT TO HAVE A DATE ANYMORE. I mean, I'M DONE WITH DATING. I think it would be much easier if you choose one girl, do approaching to get to know each other, and if you think s/he is so into you, then declare your love to him/her and everything's done. Unlike dating who could probably might hurt one side who truly love you whether on the other side your partner is like having fun with another. It hurts and I don't wanna get hurt anymore. I just want to have a special, a serious relationship with a guy who could truly take me the way I am :(
I'm like over dating. I'm over it. I don't want to kiss a guy who isn't my bf. I don't want to be lonely again. I just want to be cuddled with a guy who literally loves me. So please, don't make fun of me with dating.
Love
DindaZein
