Friday, July 30, 2010

I Want To Be Half As Amazing As You

I am an avid stalker of post secret and a few weeks ago I read quite possibly my favourite post secret ever, it said something along the lines of ‘Most people don’t want to be anything like their parents but I hope I’m half as amazing as you’ . It made me smile all day, it is exactly how I feel, my parents are the most amazing people in the world. I am so lucky to have grown up in a loving and supportive home with both of them along with my sister. We have definitely had our fights over the years but they have always supported me in my decisions and let me make my own mistakes. They treat and respect me as an adult and I always return the same for them.

I have some friends who think it’s weird that my parents and I are so close, when I’m sworn to secrecy from a friend and I can’t keep it in, I know my mum will listen and tell me what I need to hear. When something is upsetting me, I know my dad will threaten to kill whoever or whatever is making me upset and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t think it’s weird that we’re close, I find it close that they aren’t close with their parents, you’ve only got two and they’re yours and nine times out of ten they’ve probably done everything they could possibly do for you.

I have a friend who used to constantly belittle her dad, tell everyone how much she hated him and wished he wasn’t her father. This man had never done anything to deserve this, yes, maybe at times he was a little harsh, but he never laid a finger on her, never deserved that type of disrespect and I used to get so angry and so upset at her for speaking about him like that until I realised not everyone is as fortunate as I am, no one has had her upbringing, her parents or her life, we don’t know what arguments go on behind closed doors or what things are happening. I chose to use that motto for my own life. No one but my sister and I have been raised by our parents, given the values, morals and upbringing they have given us and still, no one knows what goes on behind closed doors.

My parents have both worked extremely hard to get to where they are today and they are still in love, they have been married over 15 years and my dad still always holds my mums hand in the car and always gives her a kiss when he gets home from work.

They put up with me through the worst of my teenage years. I was a wreck and they pulled me out of it, got me the help I needed and straightened me back out. They saved me from myself, something I thought I would never get out of. When I made terrible mistakes they never judged or said I told you so, they would let me figure things out on my own, and I love them for that. I love them for having enough faith and respect in me that I could get myself out of 90% of the situations I’d put myself in. They always gave me great advice and told me I could be whatever I wanted to be, they supported me when I told them I wanted to go to uni, then when I decided I didn’t want to go anymore, then supported me again when I decided I wanted to go back to uni and I wanted to do it somewhere else, they supported my decision to move out of home and move away. I have had nothing but support from them. Every time we speak on the phone the last thing I say is I love you and that’s the last thing I hear back. Every time my dad comes to visit, I see the excitement in his face and the tears in his eyes he tries to hide that show the worry and concern that his eldest is living all alone.

My friends have very different opinions of my parents then I do, first impressions of my dad are usually ‘he’s scary’ and of my mum ‘she’s so sweet’. My opinion is the complete opposite. Although yes, when you physically look at my dad he doesn’t give off the most comforting vibe, he is a big man, who works hard and doesn’t like small talk while the soccer is on, but he is the sweetest and most caring man and he’s not afraid to show his emotions, or wear a pink shirt to work, after a while when my friends get to know him, they seem to realise he’s not actually scary, he is exactly like me and he’s passionate and he’s got some pretty excellent lame dad jokes and actually, the first impression of my mum is usually always right, minus the fact they all think she’s 5+ years younger than she actually is which always makes her smile. I love her because she always teaches me to always live in simplicity and therefore she deserves to be called as the greatest role model for me.

When I grow up and have kids, that’s what I want to be like, exactly like my parents, the way they raised me is the way I want to raise any future children I may have. I don’t care if friends say it’s weird that I’m close with my parents, I find it weird that you’re not. My parents are the two most important and influential people in my life, and I want to be half as amazing as them.


Wednesday, July 28, 2010

another date, another story

today was such a lil bit weird day. first, I had lunch at Bugis and shared table with an-old-fvking man who was insisting on flirting to me. hell yeah, I felt like throwing my plate toward his face. second, the MRT captain waved at me when I was about to aboard the train. gross.

Other than that, today was another "awesome date" that I have with him. As always, he who likes to go to Esplanade asked me to go there to watch concert. again and again (actually it's only been twice. hehe) Oh well, last nite he called me for nearly one hour after long-time-didn't-phone. Dozen of sillyness we made, such as I asked him to sing and ngaji for me and he really did it. HAHA. then.. I also said that I'd love to try to take the bus with him because I think it's gonna be romansome (romantic + awesome). You know right, bus in singapore is quite decent. You possibly fall asleep there. I mean, if we are comparing to bus in Indonesia, I can say here is pretty much better. Doesn't mean to insult my own country but it really is.

So there I was, Esplanade to meet him. We made appointment at 6 and I reached there before six. I couldn't find him so I went to toilet first. Finished, then I saw him sitting nicely with his iphone. I sat right next to him and he didn't even great me for almost 15 minutes. I was such a dumb, sitting next to him while he was busy with his iphone listening to the music and pretending as if none was sitting by him. Until finally he sms-ed me while he was playing with his phone, "so u dun wanna say hi first huh? u r the one who's late". NO NO NO NO! I didn't want to say hi first bcs I was the one who came first!ly I'm a stubborn if I know that I am right. So, he eventually greeted me first. We broke the ice! hehe

I dunno if there's special occasion today but there were so many people in Esplanade. We don't like crowds. So.. after waiting for half and an hour, we decided to go out of concert hall. Dumby. Haha. We went to the rooftop of Esplanade which is I've never been there before. Oh heaven, turns out that's awesome! You can see Marina Park from there!!! We sat for a while there. I asked him whether he had dinner with the Snigles today or not, ended up he cajoled me to have dinner with them.

Oh no!! Means, I got to meet Wann and Suhaimi again. I've met them previously yet when I was dating with Shah you know! So today I met him with another guy who is Shah's friend!! HAH! chilled, I ensured my self that I really gotta meet them bcs it would be happen sooner or later. Finally, I had really met them, we had dinner at the food court first . There, I quoted one of Wann's word. She was telling us about her stiry with Suhaimi. (well, Wann's story is lil bit similar to mine of which she's ex of Suhaimi best friend before the got married). If I'm not mistaken, it was like "yeah, I know that you don't like me at first! You just put a pity on me! From pity than turned into liking and from liking it finally became love". When I heard that, I was kinda amazed. I saw Syaff, he was like amazed as well. you know why? because it seems like that words really represents us. hemjh ok, forget it.

Finished for dinner, we moved and were chilling out at Starbucks. I BROKE THE ICE! Turns out, Wann and Neneh are nuts over the bag, like me. SO we talked a lot about bag there. Also, they insinuated me with the words "frying chicken" hehehe.

After about two hours hung out at Starbucks, he sent me home and we did took the bus! HURRAY!! Well, why do I seem so happy? because I like to take the bus! actually I prefer take the bus to train if I'm not in hurry. Because if you take the bus, you can see the downtown. So there we were, in the bus. We talked and laughed a lot., he hugged me tightly we sang together, and I assisted him to peel his sprue. Syaff is having sprue. So sad of him :(

So, done for today. It was just a simple date tho, but as long as I'm with him, it could so romansome. at least, for me. Plus somehow, I have a feeling that he starts to like me. He has a feeling for me even if just 10%. I can feel it from the way he hugs me. another point, Wann said this to me before we seperated "Gud bye Dinda, you should hang out with us more often!". I'm happy, means, snigles starts to accept me. Thanks for tonite, Syaff. Hope to meet you as soon as possible.

Ps: Syaff has got a new postition in his office. he's now is a IT exscutive! he gave me his name card. oh I'm such a proudy girlfriend -ups- dating!


Love,
DindaZein

 
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